Step back, turn around, step forward, sit down, open Word, start writing.
All this — with filigree precision, without a chance for error, without a drop of inaccuracy, without the shadow of a banana peel under your feet.
You ask who taught me? Who is my master? Where does my OCD come from??
I will answer you with this text.
The Shogun again oppresses the lands of honest samurai vagabonds, preventing them from wandering around the area and doing feats, sushi and children.
The vile supporters of the shogun have flooded the area and are spreading terror and new martial arts techniques, dirty, dishonest, such as throwing a grappling hook or BOW.
Long-range weapons as a way to assert oneself, what have we come to, baby..
You will have to demonstrate to them the power of the Great Sword Strike in Front of You for One Cell, Trained 10.000 Times.
Oh yes, it’s time to show the full power of 1 IQ multiplied by a thousand. The holy conservatism of the ancient traditions of deaf autistic monks.
Naturally, alone.
Naturally, in a mysterious hat. Naturally, after the skinny girl with a katana defeats a bunch of enemies and raises a peasant uprising, as well as the country’s economy by mining rice, to open your character.
Everything looks simple, like those mobile games from the 2000s: there is a field of several cells for a step, there is a set of starting techniques, you need to use them, and then watch how the character implements them in the specified order.
Spear strike — reversal — spear strike — it’s simple.
“And then there were more than one enemies”.
Already the first fight shows: one mistake, and you are no longer FLAWLESSVICTORY, another, third, and now you already have 1 life, you stand with your back to the enemy, who will now lower his sword, and you have no chance of salvation.
Where were you in a hurry, pressing everything??
You know that you can just stand still, strike at the right time, and the enemy will be defeated?
You are a SAMURAI, not a monkey https://dazzlecasinoonline.co.uk/ with a stick and rolls, shouting obscenities at the Heavens.
The game quickly soars up, equaling itself with chess, and asks you to think about every action — otherwise haste will push the cherry blossoms right into the sunset over Fuji, and you will have to enjoy the silence of the surrounding villages.
After all, in addition to cards with strikes, a person can perform actions such as:
— Stand still. —
— turn around. —
— Standing still threateningly. —
— SPECIAL TREAT —
And all this is very useful, because the trick cards require recharging — and the enemy requires the character’s blood and moves. The tactics of the game are revealed in all their glory: as if in a samurai movie, the character makes a perfect lunge, stands, missing a move, the enemy comes up from behind, the blow is recharged, a turn, a perfect lunge..
“You are not a slowdown, you are a tactician”.
Shogun Showdown is like a sudoku, like a crossword puzzle, like a COLORING book – it brings pleasure to the process of thinking.
The game does not force you to make strategic plans; it offers the ability to dodge in any situation, having a limited set of actions.
And at the same time, strategicity is in place — thanks to the global map.
Classic Sleimnevspar approach to levels — branches, choose the WAY of the samurai further, between battles — shops with improvements.
Thanks to them, you can build dozens of tactics, and the worst thing is that each reception card can be improved — including things like poison, fire, magic — and our Ronin with a spear is already motionlessly capable of annihilating the entire district in 1 turn, simply by correctly calculating the sequence of using the cards.
If SlayTheSpire used mechanics this way, it would be game of the year.
Enemies constantly add drama: just got used to the standard ones, archers appear, some ninjas appear, each with their own fighting style, and you need to adapt to them, remember whose turn it is and who attacks how — and most importantly.
Remember that they can attack each other.
And with the correct calculation, the real Symphony of Skills No. 11 by Tchaikovsky appears on the screen.
A few dodges and turns can make enemies crumble each other into a crimson mush, into a crimson sunset.
Jackie Chan proud of you.
Patterns, summoning assistants, DISHONESTY.
Despite many attempts, I still have not defeated the shogun — even after putting together an absolutely unbreakable build. Although it is possible [and most likely], I was just in a hurry, too self-confident in my power.
This game TEACHES MORALITY.
And the pleasure of the inscription “Destruction” after a battle in which you did not receive a single unit of damage.
This Monsieur is a modern roguelike, and therefore as new deaths come, new tricks and new improvements.
Everything is obtained by killing bosses, and new characters are obtained by completing them.
At some point, the player discovers that he is essentially playing as a magician who deals damage from afar — but he started out as an ordinary samurai.
Or you can just invest in ranged combat and dodging, throwing shurikens and moving around like an angry ferret.
The main thing is not to rush.
Graphics and music are pixelated according to real documents of that era, which adds ambiance and drama to PS 1 to the pixelated Rubilov on the screen.
Goblinz seem to feel the pixels, releasing another masterpiece, like Devolver Digital in terms of crazy indies.
A fast, mind-boggling, step-by-step machine for self-development through thinking.
Online shooters? MOBA? Arenas? No.
Pixel turn-based game.
Essentially a fighting game put on a slide device.
One of the best mind workouts I’ve ever seen.
To everyone — against your opponents, who are always smeared thanks to your unsurpassed art, and remember — the size of the spear is not important, what is important is the skill of wielding it.